For those of you who have older children...you'll probably understand where I'm coming from...regarding this thread.

For those of you young-uns out there, who fall into this category, you may want to wake up and smell the roses...it's not always going to be "cookies and cream"...and your parents...even though they love you...really don't want you living with them for the rest of their lives.  We have lives we want to lead, as well...

Don't get me wrong...it's not that we don't love you...we do.  We just want you to go out there and make something of yourself...get a great job...get married...have children...but most of all..."EVENTUALLY MOVE OUT"!

Always remember that we love you, but we're not going to be around forever...and eventually we may want to make that trip to Hawaii, or overseas...have a romantic candlelit dinner at home...without having someone come strolling into the living room in their underwear yelling, "Hey, Mom!  What's for dinner?"

Now...we as parents may have instigated this by spoiling our children rotten...and I don't want this post to label me as a parent that could really care less.  That's far from the truth.

I just think there comes a time in ones life when they have to make a decision as to what they want to do with the rest of their lives.  However, I don't think this should happen at the age of 27...or later, for that matter.

So my question is this...

How do you feel about your children living with you into their late twenties...thirties...forties, etc., etc.

Trust me when I say this...I know because I have a former brother-in-law, who's over 60 years old...still living with his mother... She still does his laundry...and cooks his dinner.

If we, as parents...don't start putting our foot down...and continue to spoil our children...I'm sorry to say, but eventually...you may be experiencing the same problem.  If you do...my prayers are with you.

There comes a time in our lives when our children have to step off the coat tails of "Mommy and Daddy" and try to make it on their own.

I've attached a poll for you to vote on the age you think a child should leave the nest.

Please keep this in mind when replying to this thread...or voting on the poll...I'm referring to the average child...and not those who absolutely require special attention.  So, don't think I'm being a little one-sided...or inconsiderate.  I'm not.

It's 2008...and this is "REALITY"...and it's time it came up and bit some of us in the "you know what".


All my best...

Stevei cant wait to move out i think mabye after collage It depends.
For me, it'll probably be around 18.  I'd like to leave and certainly get out of England.
Other people will stay and get what they can out of their parents, but I'm not like that, I really don't like asking for help and anything bought for me never really feels like it's mine.  I prefer to earn my own money, go my own way, and I can't wait to have my own house etc, because then I'll be dependent only on myself without placing a burden on anyone.
I can't stand it when people just try to get everything they can without giving in return, it sickens me.
However I can understand why people stay at home for a long time, and sometimes it's necessary if they can't find a job or a home or something.Granted...

There can be extenuating circumstances which prevent the child from leaving home, however, those who have the ability and the initiative, but tend to ride it out...I have no SYMPATHY for.

...and Calum, when you do...all the best, my friend.Just to let you know, before I get all fired up, here, that I voted for the 18-25 segment.

These are the ages, at least here the America, when children finish high school and college, and should be able to go forth into the world and make their way.  Many do

I contend that it's not as easy to make a start as it used to be.  I graduated high school in 1978.  Many jobs and careers could still be had on a high school diploma.  Restaurant management was one career.  Someone could start as an assistant manager, and work up.  (Some of those jobs are still available, but I mention that field because it's one that I know, where many of the "entry-level" management jobs now require a college degree.)

More and more fields require college to get a start.  Why?  College is, in too many cases, a "racket."  Yes, college has (and should) be a requirement for certain fields -- medicine, the sciences, engineering, accounting, and education come to mind.  For many other segments of the business world, I wonder how much of the theoretical knowledge learned in school really applies to the real world.  (Meanwhile, college tuition skyrockets, because college has become such a necessity.  What's a person to do?)  (A recently quoted statistics stated that if the price of goods had kept up with the price of college tuition, a gallon of milk would cost $15 US.)

So, many can't just jump out the door at 18, with a high school diploma, and be on their way.  Now, in how many fields is a bachelor's degree not good enough, and a master's or doctorate is required?

Where the entry level jobs are not BARRED by a college degree, some are not available because employers are hiring from different segments of the population.  I've talked to several parents who complained that their children are unable to find PART time jobs to help defray high school and college expenses.

Our society is turning upside-down.  Our biology says we should have our children in the late teens and early twenties, but it's taking until, in a lot of cases, our late twenties to mid-thirties to become established and be able to start families of our own.

A couple of former corworkers of mine explained they put their children through college out of a form of selfishness -- they didn't want the kids living with them forever!

Once you get the kids out, can they stay out?  I know of quite a few families where the children (and their families) have had to return to the parents because of LOSS of good jobs and income.  Sure, some of it is because of foolish spending or overspending, but not all of it -- loss of one income, loss of two incomes.

We are "speaking" in generalities, here.  I completely agree that those who have the talent, skills, and means to do so, should go forth and make their own ways, and not be a burden on parents.







Great post, Aegis...

It would seem the older generation has a different view on this subject.

Personally...I never had anything handed to me on a silver platter.  Whatever I had I worked for.  I left the nest at the age of 17 and joined the MILITARY...something I think the younger generation should experience...

Great thing about the military...is that it helps build character, stamina, discipline, etc., etc. and the benefits available are invaluable...especially when it comes to learning a career...or saving for college.

However...what bothers me the most is that there are those who have the ability, but choose not to use it, because they are "comfortable" with the way things are...and are just opportunists...who take advantage of their parents...because it's easier for them to deal with.  They think their parents will be around forever to take care of them...so they continue to "party", spend their money frivolously...and hide in their rooms to escape reality.

This is just my opinion...and I'm sure we'll hear different views...and I look forward to them all. Quote

However...what bothers me the most is that there are those who have the ability, but choose not to use it, because they are "comfortable" with the way things are...and are just opportunists...who take advantage of their parents...because it's easier for them to deal with