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Growing Significance Of Counsellors To Students Teenage and adolescent students are the ones that need counselling most. Adolescence is considered to be a period of stress and strain and therefore adolescent students need counselling most. The modern students are baffled at the different ideas that are propagated by the various groups in the society. Some of these ideas are quite conflicting. The influx of mobile phones and the wide use of the internet have given the students a lot of choices, both for doing good and also for evil.

There are religious fundamentalist groups and terrorist groups that want to get the youths into their clutches. Students do not know what is right and what is wrong, whom to believe and whom not to believe. They are bombarded with information and they don’t know what to choose and what to reject. Hence comes the necessity to have counselling and counsellors. The pie diagram shows that 35% of the students approach counsellors with their problems. Friends come next in importance with 30%. The role of teachers is only 20% whereas the least in the group is parents with a mere 15%. 

Students do not often go to their parents and teachers for counselling because of their sense of shame and fear. They want to appear good boys and girls before their parents and teachers. But the fact is their mind is not at ease because of the problems they face. So, for solutions they approach counsellors and to a lesser extent their friends. When children go to their parents with doubts about sex and sexuality, the usual answer is: “Don’t ask me these things!” or “Don’t you have shame to ask me such things?”

1. The theme is the importance of reading.

2. According to the advertisement, the threat faced by readers today is the digital world which takes people away from reading books.

3. Reading has many advantages: It helps you to reach another world and thus you can escape from your problems. Books are beyond imagination. A book is always a reliable companion. In sorrow and joy, in disease and health books make good companions. Children who read books will be happy.

Bhargavinilayam

An enthusiastic and talented novelist (Madhu) comes to stay in a desolate mansion named Bhargavi Nilayam. The novelist and his servant Cheriya Pareekkanni (Adoor Bhasi) experience the presence of a strange entity here. They come to know from the local people that it is a haunted house. The story is that it is haunted by the ghost of the daughter of the previous owner. The novelist and his servant encounter strange happenings here – the gramophone plays on its own, objects move around. The novelist finds some old letters written to Bhargavi (Vijaya Nirmala) by her lover Sasikumar (Prem Nazir). It is believed that the ghost of Bhargavi now haupts this house.

The letters give some indication about their love affair and their tragic deaths. The novelist decides to probe the matter. He starts writing the story of Bhargavi. The information gathered from the local people and the hints in the letters help him in his writing. The story develops. Bhargavi falls in love with her neighbour Sasikumar who is a talented poet and singer. Bharagavi’s father’s nephew, Nanukuttan (P. J. Antony) is also in love with Bhargavi. But Bhargavi hates Nanukuttan who is a bad man. Nanukuttan tries all nasty tricks to separate the lovers. He kills Sasikumar. Bharagavi becomes furious when she comes to know of her lover’s murder. In a scuffle Nanukuttan pushes Bhargavi into a well, killing her. Nanukuttan spreads the news that Bhargavi had committed suicide. 

The novelist reads out the story to the ghost who by now has become quite compassionate with him. Nanukuttan overhears the story. He fears that once the story is published the truth behind the death of Bhargavi and Sasikumar will be out. He attacks the novelist and a ght ensues. During the ght both Nanukuttan and the novelist reach the well in which Bharagavi was drowned. While trying to push the novelist into the well, Nanukuttan loses his balance. He falls into the well and is killed, while the novelist escapes. The novelist then prays for the peace of Bhargavi’s soul and the movie ends with the laugh of Bhargavi. 

Bhargavinilayam means The House of Bhargavi’. It is a 1964 Malayalam horrorromance lm written by Vaikom Muhammed Basheer and directed by A. Vincent. The film stars Prem Nazir, Madhu and Viiava Nirmala in the lead roles. Its story, screenplay and dialogues are written by Vaikom Muhammad Basheer. It was the directorial debut of noted cinematographer A. Vincent. The lm is especially noted for its music by M. S. Baburaj. It was the first horror film in Malayalam and was one of the biggest hit films of all time.

a. They are attractive because the pictures we get in those similes are vivid. We easily understand them. Similes are powerful ways of describing things.

b. Here are some adjectives: as black as hell, as blind as a bat, as bold as brass, as brave as a lion, as busy as a bee, as cheap as dirt, as clean as a whistle, as clear as day, as clumsy as an elephant, as cold as marble, as cold as steel/stone, as cool as a cucumber, as cunning as a fox, as dark as death.

c. Hello and Welcome: as fresh as daisies; as gay as a peacock Films at a Glance: as pure as a lily MITR, My Friend: as sharp as an arrow; as empty as a drum 

English Vinglish: as sweet as a candy 

Makalkku: as heavy as lead; as soothing as a lullaby

A horegallu is a stone bench. It helps tired persons to sit down and rest for sometime so that they can regain their energy.

The grandfather refreshed the travellers just by listening to them. The villagers would talk of their troubles to him and he would listen. This seemed to refresh them.

The special memories the author associates with ‘horegallu’ are about her grandfather sitting on the horegallu talking with villagers who work in the nearby fields. Her grandfather was a retired school teacher and he would sit on the horegallu under the banyan tree in the village. The tired villagers would come and sit on the stone bench and talk to her grandfather. When she felt tired after playing she would also sit near her grandfather listening to the conversations he was having with the villagers resting there.

Hot summer days remind me of my childhood in a small village. There was a large banyan tree right in the middle of the village. During holidays I spent many hours playing under it. The tree was like a big umbrella. It gave much needed shade and comfort. Travellers spent some time sitting under it, taking some rest, before they continued their journey. To make them comfortable there was a ‘horegallu’ under the tree. ‘Horegallu’ means ‘a stone that can bear weight’.

It was a large at stone placed horizontally overtwo vertical stones. It was a stone bench. People could sit on it, chat with a fellow traveller and exchange news of the road. Cool water was kept in earthen pots and travellers could drink the water. I am sure such simple arrangements are found all over the country.

The horegallu in our village brings special memories for me because it is connected with my grandfather. He was a retired school teacher. He would spend hours sitting under the banyan tree, talking to those resting there. When I got tired of playing I would sit next to him listening to their conversations and observing the people.

Most of the villagers were taking a break from their work in the nearby fields. They had to walk long distances each day. They had to carry heavy burdens on their heads. Tired by the heat, they would drink the cold water, wash their faces and chat with my grandfather. They often talked about their lives and worries.

One man would say, “Masterji, this summer has been so hot. I have never seen such a dry weather.” Another would say, “Masterji, it is getting difficult for me to carry heavy loads on my head. Thank God for this horegallu. I want my son to help me but he simply wants to go to the city.” My grandfather listened to their talk and they felt refreshed. They would soon go away with their burdens. The horegallu was an important feature in their lives and I wondered why they blessed it so often.

It was just a stone bench. Then my grandfather told me that a horegallu is essential in any journey. We all carry burdens in our different ways. Once in a while we need to stop, put down that burden and rest. Only then we will be refreshed to carry the load again. The horegallu helps the people to regain their strength.

Later in life I happened to see something that reminded me of that horegallu. I was working in Mumbai. One of my colleagues was Ratna. She was a senior clerk, middle-aged and always smiling. She had been working in the company for nearly 25 years, after her graduation. She continued working with a cheerful face. 

Every day during lunch hour, she would sit with some person in one of the rooms, chatting with him/her. I often wondered what they talked about. One day I asked what they discussed during the lunch hour. Ratna told me that they shared their troubles with her.

I asked her how she could help in solving their problems. Did she have an answer for them? She told me she only listened to them. I was young and I wondered how merely by listening to somebody’s problem, it gets solved. She then told me that she was not a trained counsellor or an intellectual. Nobody can solve your problem. You have to solve it yourself. I then wondered what the point was of listening to somebody’s problem if no help can be given. 

Ratna answered me patiently. She told me that God had given her two ears to listen to others. She hears people with sympathy and no judgment. When somebody talks about his worries, it relieves him a lot. I then wanted to know if she ever told other the secrets she heard. Ratna told me that not even in her dreams she would do that. Revealing somebody’s secret is the worst kind of betrayal. People told her of their worries because they were certain that she would never tell others about them. They relieve themselves by talking about their burdens and they continue with their life’s journey.

Ratna’s words reminded me of my grandfather sitting on the bench stone listening to people. Neither my grandfather nor Ratna were rich. But in their small ways they were doing great social service. No one thought of acknowledging their work or giving them any rewards. But they continue doing their service and it gives them joy. Whenever I pass by a horegallu anywhere, I think of my grandfather and Ratna. I wish there were more such ‘bench stones’ in this world.

I would like to know how you happened to come to this Old Age Home. Do you mind telling me about your family members and what they do. Can I ask you to describe to me how marriages took place in your young days?

Unacknowledged 

Legacy 6 June 2017 

We all know the old adage “Old is Gold”. How many of us are really prepared to acknowledge that our parents and grandparents were a treasure house of knowledge and wisdom? Knowledge and wisdom come from experience. Many things are learned from experience and not merely from books. Our parents and grandparents have been imparting us their wisdom not only through their words but also their deeds. We are starting this Bloggers’ Group titled Unacknowledged Legacy to pay tribute to our older generations. Today we are what we are just because of our parents and grandparents.

They are the one who brought us up, taught us to dream high and work hard to achieve our dreams. Often, as young and inexperienced people, we may have resented their interference in our lives. We may have then thought that they are autocrats who want to keep us under their tight control. If they hadn’t exercised their authority and restrained us, many of us would have been abject failures. Thanks to their wisdom, we are today somebody and we should ever remain grateful to them.

This blog invites members to contribute their stories of how they were assisted by their parents and grandparents to reach their present position. Make your contributions short and sweet. Brevity, they say, is the soul of wit.

Lilly Jacob

A horegallu is a stone bench on which tired people can rest and regain their energy. Such stones are usually under shady trees. Tired travellers unburden themselves, sit, and talk to some sympathetic listener. Life is a journey and we all are travellers. Each one of us carries burdens of various sorts. If there is some patient and sympathetic listener, we can unburden ourselves and feel relieved. The horegallu will not solve your problem but it gives you a temporary relief. The author expects each of us to be a horegallu.

Her simplistic outlook is God has given her two ears to listen to others. She is not a trained counsellor or an intellectual and she can’t solve people’s problems. They have to do it themselves. She simply listens to the people with sympathy and without any judgment. She believes that when a person in stress nds an outlet for is worries, it relieves him a lot.

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Dearest Ratna, 

I want to thank you for all the valuable suggestions and advice you gave me. As a young girl, I did not know much about the importance of listening to others. When I saw you listening to people every day after lunch, I used to wonder why you were wasting your time listening to the trouble of others. Do you remember me asking you that question?

And then you told me “We are given two ears to listen.” It was a great answer. You further told me that even by listening to the problems of people you are helping them because they feel relieved by telling what they feel in their mind to some sympathetic listener.

Now I am running a big business and I have seen how helpful your suggestions had been. I too now practise what you taught me – to listen to people without prejudice or judgment. I have found it a good thing, both for me as well as the person to whom I listen.

Thank you, Ratna. Thank you very much. Please do keep in touch! Sudha Murty

Dear Friends, 

I have great pleasure in introducing Ratna to you. She and I were colleagues a few years ago. I have learned a lot from Ratna and probably that is why I am now able to run this big business. It is from Ratna I learned what a “horegallu” really means. A horegallu is a stone bench. It helps tired persons to sit down and rest for some time so that they can regain their energy. Ratna was a horegallu in the sense she helped tired and miserable people to regain their energy, patiently listening to their problems. Every day during lunch hour, she would sit with some person in one of the rooms, chatting with him/her.

I often wondered what they talked about. One day I asked her and Ratna told me that they shared their troubles with her. I then asked Ratna how she could help in solving their problems. Did she have an answer for them? She told me she only listened to them. I was young then and I wondered how merely by listening to somebody’s problem, it gets solved. She then told me she was not a’trained counsellor or an intellectual. Nobody can solve your problem. You have to solve it yourself. 

Ratna explained things to me further. God has given her two ears to listen. She hears people with sympathy and no judgment. When somebody talks about his worries, it relieves him a lot. Ratna never revealed to others what people told her. This way Ratna helped people to be relieved and to go on with their journey of life. This way she was serving people in her own way. 

I thank Ratna for what she did to all and to me. 

Let us take a leaf from Ratna and become horegallus in our own way.

Dear students, 

As you talk so eagerly and make so much of noise, l am reminded of my young days. Before I became a teacher, I worked for sometime in a business office in Mumbai. In the office there were many workers. One of them was Ratna. a middle-aged senior clerk. She has been working there for 25 years. She had a smiling face. It was a pleasure talking to her. 

I used to see her talking with someone everyday during lunchtime. I often wondered what they were talking about. One day I asked Ratna what they discussed. Ratna told me that the persons with whom she talked shared their troubles with her. I then asked Ratna how by listening to one person, she could solve his problems. Ratna said God has given us two years to listen. Even if we can’t solve problems for people, we can help them by listening to them. A troubled person feels relieved when he tells a sympathetic listener about his troubles. I know Ratna was right. 

So children, stop talking and start listening. Only by listening, you will know more things. By knowing more things you will be empowered and you can become what you want to become.