New Coke. CHIA PETS. Ashton Kutcher. All are bad ideas that should have been snuffed out before they emerged into public consciousness. All are things that make you scratch your head and say, "What in God's name were they thinking?"

Pop quiz: What talked to anyone who wandered by, sang the same damned songs all the time (always off-key), did a lousy Elvis impersonation, and had more than a passing resemblance to Bullwinkle J. Moose? No, it wasn't your Uncle Festus. It was Buck, the Animated Singing Trophy Deer.

This motion-activated life-size deer head--from Gemmy Industries, the same demented folks who brought us Big Mouth Billy Bass, the singing fish--swung its antlers from side to side as it murdered classics LIKE "Rawhide," "Sweet Home Alabama," and "On the Road Again." Why not Blondie's "(I'm Always Touched by Your) Presence, Deer" or Jimmy Buffett's "Door Number Three" ("And Monte, I sure need the doe")?

Answer: a failure of imagination. The kit did include a microphone, however, so you could project your own voice via Buck's lips, amusing your friends and frightening the children.

Sure, it sounds like fun, but after the third rendition of "Suspicious Minds," this novelty item's novelty value began to PLUMMET toward negative numbers. We recommend passing this Buck as quickly as possible--not hard as he has been discontinued.

Good NEWS...perhaps? Big Mouth Billy Bass is now available as an iPhone app. Warning: It's awful!

Actually, that deer head could be useful for a practical joke. you know, put it in say, your bed next to your wife/GF, and then talk to them through the microphone or something, and be all like "OMG, something is wrong...I can't feel my arms or legs!"

and then when they lift the covers "AHHHHH! You've been transformed into a deer bust!"